This post won Family Lore’s Post of the Month Award for April 2010.

We were sitting around the table at dinner in a restaurant in Eilat. This time of year is for family and friends, so there were lots of young people chatting away. As it turned out, quite a few were newly qualified lawyers, or trainee lawyers doing their compulsory two years internship with various law firms in the City. The talk turned to the challenges of putting “real life” law, as opposed to training and theory, into practice. At that point I asked about how the ethical courses they had received stood up to the rigours of legal practice in the real world.

One of my nieces told me that on her course, professional ethics had been one of the most intensive subjects of all, requiring a higher pass rate. Failure in that subject meant failing the entire course.

I’m not surprised. When I qualified as a solicitor, Lord Denning’s words at the admission ceremony have stayed with me all my life, and I have often repeated them in this blog. One of this country’s most famous judges of all time, Lord Denning was also Master of the Rolls, and therefore the person who signed my admission into law.

“Always do what is right in your head, and you will never go wrong”, he said. How right he was.

However I would, with respect, like to add another phrase. I hope it will help young trainees or newly qualified solicitors who, through sheer lack of experience, might be tempted to stray from “the straight and narrow” as we English people tend to say.

It is this: Continue reading »

It’s spring! Yes: springtime has come to the North of England. Across the 200 acres of open parkland, laid out in the 18^th century and known as the Harrogate Stray, spring flowers are coming into bloom. How cheery they have started to look and how cheerful it makes you feel, driving up the hill into Harrogate with the park and the pretty flowers on either side.

At lunchtime yesterday, I couldn’t resist: the sun was shining and I went for a walk along the Stray. I walked past the Tewit Well where, in 1571, the first mineral water was discovered by William Slingsby. The well is still there, covered by a dome. I walked all around the Stray. It is fabulous: it stretches through the entire town and although Harrogate is a thriving commercial centre, it certainly doesn’t feel like one. We have the best of both worlds. It is good to work in such a beautiful place and equally good to exercise and then relax.

On my return I popped into Hotel Chocolat and bought some irresistible chocolate Easter eggs. Heaven! After the office closed, some of us went to watch our very own Morna Rose, Practice Manager and Tina Davis, Credit Control Manager, who are both appearing at the Harrogate Theatre in Fiddler on the Roof. Dinner followed at a delicious little Italian restaurant called Sasso in the nearby square, and then home to bed.

We are entering the Harrogate in Bloom competition again this year, and our office is already looking very pretty. Continue reading »

The Stowe Family Law offices in Yorkshire and Cheshire are particularly busy at this time of year. I am also spending time in London, seeing clients there and readying our new office in High Holborn. I am making the most of the spare time that I have, immersing myself in things that make me laugh and feel good.

So right now I am very particular about what I listen to. I like music that is easy on the ear – but sufficiently “boom boom” to get me moving – and a radio presenter with a good sense of humour. Music and fun set me up for the busy day ahead.

Right now one presenter worth listening to, in my opinion, is Peter Levy. He is based at BBC Radio Humberside, in Hull of all places. I admit I’m biased because that city is fielding two teams against my currently battered team, the Leeds Rhinos. Rugby league has long been my favourite spectator sport; Hull FC with its new addition Sean Long – he of the sexy long blonde dreadlocks, formerly of our greatest rival, St Helens - may prove to be a major problem for us this season.

So I do sympathise that Peter Levy has chosen to base himself in Hull, poor man. I reckon that for him, it is time for a change…

Let me explain.

I first came across Peter when he was presenting the local news on TV. Chirpy, chippy, unflappable and “nicely” rude, I liked his sense of humour. I still do – until it is deployed against me, that is. Continue reading »

Sometimes, clients who come to see me are in a state of shock. Not everyone appreciates how serious this condition can be. There are different medical types of shock, but psychological shock is a traumatic reaction following a dramatic, unexpected incident such as a family crisis. In my field it can often occur when the client unexpectedly learns of an affair and/or the other spouse’s decision to end the marriage.

It is important never to underestimate the impact of shock on a client. Shock affects a client’s state of mind and can take weeks, months or even longer to overcome. Some of those who find it difficult to return to normal can even develop the more serious (but treatable) condition known as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

When I see clients who appear to be suffering from shock, I politely and gently suggest that they return to see me when they are able to give me the information that I need to advise them appropriately – and also when they are able to make an informed decision about their future. It is clear even to me, a lay person, when a client is in deep shock and unable to take in a single word that I am saying. If a client persists, then of course I will give my advice – and I will follow it up in writing, as I do with all clients. At least the client will have something to read when they feel better able to take it in.

How does psychological shock manifest itself?

The symptoms vary but at first there may be numbness, a feeling of being dazed and an inability to absorb the information which has led to the shock. The mind will keep replaying the information, totally denying it, refusing to believe it can be true. Nothing else that is happening will matter: the surrounding circumstances, the people, what is playing on the radio… They will all blur into the background.

I had never experienced “shock” at first-hand until very recently. Put simply, it was awful. Continue reading »

On Friday I enjoyed the company of family lawyers from around Europe. We had gathered in Paris for the opening of the law firm Cabinet CBBC (formerly the Cabinet Veronique Chauveau). With so many of us gathered in one place, the talk turned to family law – and how we are separated by our respective countries’ laws, customs and conventions.

Within the European Union, transnational family law does not operate as smoothly as one might reasonably expect, despite the determination to create a genuine area of freedom, security and justice whereby decisions taken in one member state are recognised and enforced throughout the EU.  Member states operate different divorce laws for its citizens, which may vary dramatically in other member countries. When litigants in member states look – understandably – for the smoothest way out of their domestic tangles, they can come a cropper.

It was a stylish and memorable evening (pictured above: with CBBC partner Alexandre Boiche and others). When I arrived at CBBC there were more than 100 people drinking champagne and attacking the buffet. The firm is located in the heart of Paris on Boulevard de Sébastapol, across three floors in a beautiful building just across from the courts on the Île de la Cité, next to Notre Dame Cathedral. I plunged straight in with my terrible French, which fortunately didn’t last too long, because most people took pity on me and spoke English!

I chatted to German lawyers from Stuttgart and Saarbrucken. I had a conversation with a French professor of law about French divorce law; there were diplomats present with an interest in child abduction cases.

Talking, it became clear that we continue to be divided and exercised by the laws that appear, vanish or change whenever a border is crossed. For example, Paris isn’t London. We don’t have a Civil Code; we have statute law and conventions of judge-made law.  La Manche divides us geographically (even if there is a tunnel underneath) but there is an economic, cultural and social divide that is reflected in our different law, practice and procedure. Continue reading »

Robin Charrot writes: Prenuptial and postnuptial agreements have been in and out of the news over the past year. Here at Stowe Family Law, the number of new enquiries about prenups and postnups has risen sharply. The same questions come up often: is such an agreement advisable, and what can be done to ensure that it is effective?

This was the subject of my talk on Thursday evening, when Stowe Family Law and Lane-Smith & Shindler, a firm of specialist trusts and estates practitioners based in central Manchester, held a joint seminar (above) at the Marriott Hotel in Hale Barns. The audience comprised of retail and private banks, accountants, investment managers and IFAs.

Speakers from both firms discussed the impact of relationship breakdown on family wealth, and advised on steps to protect family wealth. Marilyn Stowe spoke about the changes in ancillary relief law over the last 10 years, which have led to far larger payouts to spouses in big money cases. Geoffrey Shindler of Lane-Smith & Shindler explored the impact of this change in the law on family trusts, and described how trusts could be vulnerable to different forms of attack from spouses. Paul Davies of Lane-Smith & Shindler explained how different drafting techniques can be used to provide added protection to trusts.

I chose to speak about the rise of prenuptial and postnuptial agreements to their current status, and described the mechanics by which the agreements are constructed. At the time of writing, such agreements are extremely influential on decisions made by our family courts in England and Wales.

Because of the level of interest in this talk, and the question and answers that followed, we are reprinting the accompanying handout here. If you are considering a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement, we hope that this information is useful. This is an area in which Stowe Family Law specialises, so you can always leave a comment or contact us directly with any additional queries. Continue reading »

New Year’s Eve and another year, indeed a decade, is almost over.

How has this year been for you? If it has been anything like mine, it has been a rollercoaster. It has passed by very quickly and, looking back, there have been some real highs. There was the faster than expected development of our Cheshire office, our acquisition of a London office set to open next year, and five of our cases included in the Law Reports. I also appeared on BBC Radio 4’s Woman’s Hour, debating against Baroness Deech on possible changes to the law on cohabitation.

 There have also been some lows: my surgery and a long slow recovery from its complications, getting used to major lifestyle changes and a dash to Israel to deal with a family emergency. I’m no different to anyone else: we all have our ups and downs, our highs and lows.

I have chosen to share many of those very personal up and down moments with my readers, because this blog isn’t just about family law and how it works in practice. It is also about connecting with other people, sharing feelings and emotions, and going through good times and bad together. Continue reading »

“Our society in England and Wales now urgently demands a second attempt by Parliament, better than in the ill-fated Part II of the Act of 1996, to reform the five ancient bases of divorce; meanwhile, in default, the courts have set the unreasonableness of the behaviour required to secure the success of a petition on the second basis, namely pursuant to s.1(2)(b) of the Act of 1973, even when defended, at an increasingly low level.” – Wilson LJ in Miller Smith –v- Miller Smith 2009 EWCA 1297

Stowe Family Law represented the successful husband in this case. The judgment of the Court of Appeal, heard before the President and given by Lord Justice Wilson, was handed down today. I will not of course discuss the specific facts of the case and nothing that follows does so. But, on a general note, Miller Smith is a useful example of alternative options available to deal with the financial problems caused by a defended divorce.

In such cases, finances cannot be dealt with in the usual manner, as the brakes are firmly applied until the divorce is out of the way, which could take a very long time. What is one party to do, who wishes to move on with his or her life and finds themselves apparently stymied?

Continue reading »

Cafcass, which stands for Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service, was coined by the Criminal Justice and Court Services Act in April 2001. A public body, Cafcass looks after the interests of children involved in family proceedings. 

Its role in private children law is to:

• Safeguard and promote the welfare of children.
• Help the courts in coming to an arrangement that would suit the child involved
• Investigate all welfare concerns and/or any wishes and feelings of a child of sufficient age.
• Provide the Court with a report of its investigations, including a recommendation.
• Help appoint a children’s guardian in cases where the children need to have their own voices.
• In some cases, help provide families with supervised contact.

Private children law proceedings are extremely emotional and traumatic experiences for families. A child’s welfare, best interests, wishes and feelings are central to children law. It is sometimes difficult, therefore, for a court to make a decision as to where a child should live and how much contact they should have with the non-resident parent without first investigating the child’s circumstances. This is where Cafcass comes in.

As a Cafcass volunteer, I used to supervise contact at a contact centre in Sheffield once every four to six weeks at weekends. I saw many families that had been subjected to the court system. I saw some cases where supervised contact worked really well, especially for the younger children. Parents and grandparents would bring age appropriate presents for children or grandchildren. These families would then move on to manage their own, unsupervised contact without the aid of Cafcass or the court system. Success.

However, the other side of the coin featured families whose behaviour prompted obvious and continuing welfare concerns. Continue reading »

Baroness Deech holds some strong views about divorce and financial settlements. The Times has reported that the academic lawyer, who chairs the Bar Standards Board, is to give a series of lectures this week. Her focus: the thorny issue of who gets what in terms of money after a divorce.  “It is no wonder that England is the divorce capital of Europe and out of step with other European countries,” she says.   Apparently she is going to argue that, put bluntly, women are getting too much, especially in the modern era of equal pay and opportunities in employment. 

The article concludes with a list of “big money” cases in which wives were given very substantial capital awards and maintenance after short marriages.

Given recent decisions such as Hvorostovsky v Hvorostovsky, one can see how all the excitement arises.  Mr Hvorostovsky finds, following a Court of Appeal, decision, that his maintenance liability should increase so that his former wife has some £37,500 per year more than she actually needs!  The reason for this increase was nothing more than the fact that the husband now has a much larger income of his own.  It is all too easy to assess the acute sense of grievance felt by such a husband, particularly where he presumably has to work very hard for this level of earnings where his former wife is able to live a life of leisure. 

The shortcoming of this debate is that it concerns a vanishingly small minority of cases.  Continue reading »