A client came to see me for the first time, accompanied by her mother.The client was attractive, well-groomed and smartly-dressed. Her mother, meanwhile, looked drawn and tired.Mrs X began by saying she felt hot. Could she please remove her jacket and her cardigan? It wasn’t hot at all but my trainee, who was there to take notes, helped her remove them. It didn’t do the trick. The client was perspiring profusely, but this isn’t unusual for those who are stressed about seeing a solicitor for the first time.My client then asked if I would mind if she removed her wig. I hadn’t realised she was wearing one. So with me sitting there, beginning to wonder what this was all about, the client took off her wig and placed it in her bag. She sat through the interview, completely bald, and began to tell me about her cancer. It had been diagnosed at a late stage, she had a life expectancy of about 20 months at most, and she had come to discuss her children’s future.

Mrs X was 38. She had two children, aged eight and six. When he had learned about her cancer, her husband had left her. He had been unable to face her illness, and for many months had been having an affair. He had told her that she could have whatever she wanted from him and that his affair “wasn’t serious”. He simply couldn’t cope. Her concern was not so much about a divorce, as for the children and what would happen to them. She wanted her mother to care for them following her death. She spoke of accepting her terminal cancer but said that without her husband, it felt difficult and pointless to continue to fight.

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It seems that the increased divorce rate amongst over-50s is a hot topic right now. Following my appearance in The Times at the beginning of this month, the Daily Mail has interviewed me for its own story on the subject. It was published on Friday 9 November.

Rise of the Saga divorce: More over-50s go it alone once children leave home

Their children have grown up. Their mortgage is paid off. And they are looking forward to a long and happy retirement - apart.

This is increasingly the experience of Britain’s over-50s, with the number of divorced couples in that age group rising relentlessly despite the overall divorce rate dropping to its lowest level for nearly three decades.

Last year in England and Wales 54,034 over-50s divorced, compared with 47,763 in 2001.

The latest figures show that there are more than two million divorced people in the 50-plus age bracket.

In a phenomenon known as “Saga divorce”, experts believe couples who have stayed together for the sake of their children reassess their own futures when their offspring have flown the nest.

Rising numbers want a new start and feel the stigma attached to divorce has diminished.

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I was interviewed for a feature in The Times, which was published on Saturday 3 November:

Divorce rates are falling - except for people over 60. What is the fallout when Granny and Grandpa split up, asks Celia Dodd

Nowadays, few people raise an eyebrow at the news that another young friend or relative is heading for the divorce courts. But what happens when couples divorce later in life? What makes couples who have rubbed along together for decades mess with the status quo so late in the day? The unpalatable stereotype of the grey-haired man trading in his wife for a younger model undoubtedly still exists, but there is a new desire around for fulfilment in later life, and women in particular have the get-up-and-go as well as the economic freedom to do something about it. Could we be entering the age of the silver divorce?

The latest set of statistics show a continued rise in divorce among the over60s age group; a trend that started in 1998. This is in marked contrast to the 22-year low in annual divorce numbers for the rest of the population. Divorce among the Saga generation may be on the rise because people in their fifties and sixties are looking forward to a longer and healthier retirement than their parents, and feel less inclined to settle for second best.

The emotional fallout when older couples separate has a knock-on effect down the generations: it divides loyalties and even splits families. For the person who has been abandoned, it’s a bitter blow at the cruellest time of life, when all the props that help younger couples to get through have taken a back seat.

“Divorce is almost worse than bereavement“

A leading divorce lawyer Marilyn Stowe, of Stowe Family Law, says: “With older clients divorce is almost worse than a bereavement because your spouse of 30-odd years is still around, enjoying retirement, but not with you. Adult children almost invariably side with the person who has been deserted, and the grandchildren will follow their parents and, as a result, the relationship between grandchild and grandparent can be ruptured.

“I think there is an increased possibility of hostility when the children are grown-up because it’s easy for them to make black-and-white moral judgments. And I think the idea that their inheritance might go to a stranger is at the back of some adult children’s minds.”

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